With diagnosis comes liberation.

On March 23, 2020 I officially received the diagnosis of Hashimoto’s Disease, after over five years being prisoner to my body. I can’t recall exactly when the symptoms began, but I can definitely recall when they became bad enough for me to start seeking medical help.

Talk to almost anyone with an Autoimmune Disease (there are many) and they’ll likely say the journey to a diagnosis took years.

However, after those years of searching for answers, once the cause of symptoms is discovered, there is liberation in knowing and beginning the treatment process. After treatment, over some period of time healing follows.

Wait, let’s rewind. Sis, how did we get here?

OK, now that you know the diagnosis, it may help to also know how I got there.

August 2014, we left our home state of Virginia and moved to the middle of nowhere in Oklahoma (Military life). There were so many changes so quickly that I attributed every uneasy feeling I experienced to the move.

Full transparency, our first day there I stood in the aisle of Walmart and cried at the culture shock of moving to such a small town with no family/friend connections. Hampton Roads, VA and Altus, OK seemed like different worlds in which I was now a foreigner without direction.

Then came the lack of energy, increased feelings of depression, and rapid weight gain.

I found myself completely drained and sprawled on the couch long periods, something I had never done previously. Yet still not feeling rested. Nothing could satisfy or sooth the waves of emotions, queasy feelings and then hunger. I thought I was pregnant, a couple tests proved that was not the case. I concluded I had become the poster child for depression.

Let me add, that on top of all of that, I experienced an inability to focus and think clearly, struggled to function through daily tasks and nothing seeming to help, plus there were body aches and pain. It all became alarming and I had to figure out what was going on.

I blamed it all on my inability to transition well until it became unbearable.

Something is wrong with me but what could this be?

That was the question I set out to answer. After a couple of doctor visits, determining I wasn’t pregnant, getting back on antidepressants and the problem still persisting, my doctor tested my thyroid levels. This is where we learned my levels were significantly off and likely the cause of my symptoms.

How can my thyroid cause this? If you’re like I was and have no clue what the thyroid does, check out 10 functions of your thyroid.

However, even after gaining this information there would still be no diagnosis or definitive answer for me, because after having my thyroid tested a second time the results appeared to be in normal range. This seesaw of up and down thyroid levels continued through my pregnancy with my daughter, afterwards, and throughout these last 3 years here in Missouri.

Fast-forward to 2019.

Around the middle of last year I was at my lowest. I mean you could look at me and see the energy depleted out of me. When the Physician Assistant walked in to my appointment, she immediately acknowledged that fact. “You don’t look like you feel well,” she said. Can we just say, it’s really bad when you actually look how you feel, when you can usually pull it together enough to appear ok.

I also want to note here that I felt instant comfort having another black woman, Physician Assistant who saw me and took my concerns seriously. I need not give you a history lesson right now, but that is a big deal for many of us.

This is where things took a turn in a new direction. An ANA panel was ordered along with some other tests. One afternoon I got the call about my test results while my husband was home for lunch. I’m glad he was because it was the first time that I heard anyone say, “these results definitely tell that you have an autoimmune disease and some of the numbers lean towards Lupus”.

I can’t lie, I was scared and emotional. This was never on my radar.

Next, it would be two months before I could get an appointment with the specialists; endocrinology and rheumatology. December finally came around, my parents came for support, we drove two hours to University of Missouri to only leave with being told, “you don’t have Lupus and we can’t help you here”.

Oh wait, one doctor did say it sounded like it could be fibromyalgia.

I returned here, notified the PA of what happened and that was the end of that. There weren’t any new directions given. I left puzzled but that wasn’t actually going to be the end for me.

My husband and I were very clear that every time I felt ill as I had been, indicating my thyroid levels were off, I would make an appointment and keep going until someone figured out what was wrong with me.

That’s when I ended up back in the clinic in March. There was a new Physician Assistant that worked in my favor. Now listen, I gave this new PA the complete run down from 2014 to 2020 without her even asking for it. I felt I was begging someone to help me at this point.

Thankfully, she decided since she would be my new provider, she would order all those tests again for her review.

On March 23, 2020 I got the call and from the other end of the phone I received my diagnosis of Hashimoto’s.

I wish I could tell you that I also received my liberation but I didn’t. There’s no medication to be prescribed or treatment plan to follow for this disease. The suggestion I was given was to try removing gluten from my diet and that may possibly help.

I had a very unhelpful conversation with Nutrition and got sick and tired of being sick and tired. Literally! I have made the decision in the past couple months that I will no longer just accept this diagnosis without doing everything I can to reduce and possibly reverse my symptoms.

I have taken control of my health. Stay tuned, I’ll be sharing exactly how I’m doing that. There is more to this journey.